Friday, December 22, 2006

Bangalore Blues

The other day, actually come to think of it, quite some time ago, one fine evening, I was riding a bike with a friend , we were coming back from someplace I think, and we were nearby the Vidhan Soudha . The place was looking beautiful – well-maintained, well-kept, clean; quite unlike the rest of Bangalore.

For no reason I came to thinking… about Bangalore..

Before I came to this city last year, I was always fascinated with it. My brother had been in Mangalore for the past 4 years… and he used to come to Bangalore sometimes…
He’d always be saying, ‘we’re at Barista’, ‘we’re at a pub’ etc. and I’d always kind of yearn to experience all those new things. Having always been in small cities (or towns), i.e. Shillong, and then Allahabad, I’ve never tasted real city life for long. I’ve been to all the metros, but never long enough to feel its pulse. It was always a glimpse…a few days, that too not as a person belonging to that city, but as an outsider.

Bangalore gave me the first real taste of a metro. Unlike all the other metros, Bangalore is not as fast paced. It has a rhythm of its own. Not slow, yet not too fast. Not the hurry of Mumbai, where people rush to the local railways at 4am in the morning, and that is not a one-day thing – it’s day to day for them. I’ve actually seen this. First time I ever went to Mumbai (it was Bombay then), our train was delayed by some hours and we reached the Dadar station at 2am at night. For some reason, which I don’t recall now, we went by local train to Victoria Terminus (then). Even at 2 am, the trains had some people, its true maybe that the city never sleeps. At VT, everything was slightly quiet when we reached (2:30 am I guess). By 4 am, to our surprise, the station started getting crowded. People rushing to the trains, getting along with the day - amazing.
Anyway, having been the small town it was, (15 years back, maybe even lesser), it has retained some of that pace. One will hardly find people outside at 1 am or something. At least I don’t think so.

Now, with the majority of the IT industry being based here, more and more people are coming to this city, exhausting the infrastructure of this completely unprepared city. Now, people complain all the time of the crowds, the pollution, traffic, the list is never-ending. Nobody seems to want to stay here anymore. Yet, nobody seems to be leaving. Everyone will be cribbing, especially when stuck in an inexplicable traffic jam for more than an hour, and yet one will be thinking a million times before migrating to the other cities.
The weather is incredible – temperate climate throughout the year, hardly any heat and hardly any cold. Having stayed in Allahabad for 4 years, a place with extreme climate, I have experienced the worst of both worlds – walking to college in the scorching heat when the temperature is 45 degrees centigrade, for a class which was cancelled after we reached….one didn’t know whether to be happy that there’s no class or frustrated that we walked all the way, and our attendance wouldn’t count (for us, learning wasn’t relevant.. attendance was all that mattered), sitting in your room, wondering how it is that you can manage using your computer without having to leave the comfort of your warm bed, waking up at 9am and seeing nothing outside but white…for the uninitiated, that’s fog I’m talking about. Anyway coming back to the point, for me Bangalore was heaven when I came here; I came in August, when in Northern India, the heat is still on. Here, it was extremely pleasant, if not cool. Every evening, for about half an hour + 15 minutes, inevitably, it would rain. Evenings, you’d need a light jacket to be comfortable. That’s it. That was last year, this year its been slightly warmer, where unavailability of fans during March and April caused a little discomfort, and the cold never really set in until December (now)….

Now, like all other people who are not Bangalorean, I too perennially complain about the city, and its innumerable unresolved problems... and yet, I’m still here. For me, Bangalore has been an eye opener. Well, it’s no wonder that I crib about the city; this is the city to which I came to start my professional career, my first job. A life very distant from the easy carefree life back at college (I know I know I cant seem to get over the fact that college is over and those days are never going to come back), a far cry from having to worry about sessionals and semesters. The life is different, the activities are different, the worries are different, the friends are different, why blame the city?

Far away from home, managing to go back about twice a year - the low-cost flight airlines websites being one of the most visited sites in my internet history, complaining about the surrounding environment is but natural. And yet, when it comes to thinking about getting a transfer to another city, nearer to home, my mind thinks ‘n’ times and answers in the negative – stay here till shifting is unavoidable. My parents also prefer that I work here …why? Besides some stray incidents of mugging, robbery and murder, Bangalore is safer than most of the other big cities. Eve-teasing is uncommon, roads are safe. Yes, nightlife stops after 11-12 in the night… but so what, I never wander out at that time anyway. At least they’re not so worried when I’m unable to pick up their phone due to some reason. No riots, no bomb-blasts, no mobs. Yes there are the occasional terror threats, until now they have never materialized. I hope they never do.

For a person like me who doesn’t drink, and cannot dance, is too lazy to go trekking etc, and doesn’t have a very large friend circle to boast of, there’s nothing much to do in Bangalore. Except for the occasional movie, shopping, window shopping, mall-hopping (that too very much reduced now, because its just not worth it.. moving around in crowded spaces with seemingly no breathing space), I hardly ever do anything different. However, for people who love to do new things, see different things, there are the trekking trips, theatre, schools to teach everything – from piano to salsa, from painting to pottery, from cooking to driving… Then there are the sudden workshops, adventure sports camps, concerts, plenty of events to choose from. And if one is in the mood of traveling out into nature, there is no dearth of places to choose from. If you’re looking for big cities, all the major cities are overnight journeys from here- Hyderabad, Chennai, Mangalore, Pondicherry, Ooty, Kodaikanal etc. etc.

Since the time I’ve been here, I’ve also gone to some places, Munnar (a place in Kerala), Mysore, Ooty, and Kodaikanal. When I was small, id traveled down South a couple of times, At that time Chennai (Madras then) was the hub; we first went there, and from there traveled to several places, Pondicherry, Mysore, Trivandrum, Kanyakumari. At that time, Bangalore was nowhere on the map really, we did come here, but mainly to travel to Mysore from here.. It was a sleepy quiet town, with wide lanes, sparse traffic, nearly non-existent tourism, who could imagine that that town would become the nerve centre of the Indian IT business? At the amazing rate the city is expanding, who knows what the future holds for this Silicon City of India? Constructions everywhere, be it commercial or residential, be it plush apartments or malls, a concrete jungle is slowly enveloping the city.

From the terrace of our house here, I can see the expanse of plain land, covered with building of all shapes and sizes….beautiful houses I might add, here in Koramangala. In the midst of the endless concrete, some patches of green tend to provide relief to the eyes; a small park, some trees, someone’s well kept garden... I look skywards, and as I see yet another distant airplane coming into the city. It’s pretty awe-inspiring actually, the rate at which airplanes take-off and land in this city. Perhaps this is the only city where, wherever you go, if you look up, at some point, you are sure to see a plane flying in some direction; the current airport being right in the middle of the city. From our house terrace, within the space of minutes, one can see 2 airplanes flying in from the same direction, while planes are flying out in the opposite direction. It’s a nice pastime - standing out there in the evenings, looking at the planes, trying to guess the Airlines.

Some say Bangalore has lost its charm; the thousands coming here every year have inadvertently destroyed it. I am non-committal towards the statement for I might be counted as one of those. Despite all the negative opinions, I don’t think Bangalore is just another big noisy city. Agreed, its changed from what it was, some good changes, some bad, but then what hasn’t changed in so many years?
I, for one, know that when I leave this city, I’m sure going to miss it.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Excerpts of a Timeless Debate...

Following is an interesting exchange of mails I had with a very dear friend of mine, who is so different, and yet so familiar. He’s a very religious person, as opposed to my slightly godless approach towards life. We hardly ever talk about it, except in the earlier stages of our acquaintance when I used to be amazed by his piousness. Neither of us ever forced our individual views on the topic (religion) and neither did we ever argue over it. This conversation cannot be called an argument, merely a discussion of opinions. I was cleaning up my inbox, and I chanced across the last mail regarding this discussion, which had the entire history of mails below it. Decided it was an interesting mix of personal views and posted it…Besides just removing the short text we use for mailing, I’ve also left out the stuff not pertaining to the topic…so things might seem a little out of context in some places..

Aftab (hereafter mentioned as ‘A’):
I know u don’t fancy religion, but I want to tell u something... you have to face up to certain things in life...
You can’t just keep ignoring it just because it seems confusing or whatever at the outset...
I know there are many things to do in this life here on earth...but have u ever pondered, is this the ultimate aim?

Is it just getting that degree, getting a job, enjoying stuff etc.,
Yes, I accept, that all that is needed but that is a part of life, not life in itself...but that’s what most have made it out to be... tell me, look at the world around you, you see all kinds of people, you see rich people, you see poor people, you see disabled people, you see the most beautiful people, you see ugly people...is that ju
st...
what I mean to say is, a disabled guy has to face up to his/her disability all thru their lives & live with it but one who is hale & hearty leads a much more comfortable life...but why? What is it that the disabled guy did to deserve it? He was just born into this world that way...its no fault of his...have you pondered why this is so...
I know u can look away & forget it because it has nothing to do with u...but there are signs in all of this for us, it is upto you to understand it..
..

I:
Hmmmmm....see that’s your outlook..... you think that one should ponder into the deeper meaning of life and its endless mysteries...But see I don’t think one can ever get the answer to his questions of the Whys, Hows and Whens , when it comes to life....
I feel these are things that are there - maybe not at as meaningless coincidence of events... but something above and beyond us.

I don’t mean the scientific details... the Big Bang and the chemistry of life.... that is something that can be understood after research and all (i.e. it’s more about the WAY it works.. rather than WHY it works..)..
Do you think all the pondering can answer the fundamental question - why were we born..? How did an assorted list of chemicals suddenly decide to merge together and create an entity of its own?
These questions can be taken in a scientific approach as well as a philosophical approach.... via science one can at least find out how... but never why.
But see.... some things are meant to be left untouched... you cant ponder about all these questions and expect an answer.

Religion is a way of giving explanation to these questions - answer all questions with the assumption of a single all powerful entity who created the world and everything within it....
Maybe so, because it is virtually impossible to imagine that the entire universe was an accident of molecules....
Then again...maybe not…

And even if the answer is Yes, I don’t think the Almighty is really looking for someone to find proof of his existence.
He's out there... having created everything, maybe observing the fruits of his effort, but I don’t think I want to ponder about all his mysterious ways while I have the opportunity of living them...anyway nothing is to come from the endless questions. At least not philosophically; scientifically maybe so but then science will never be able to answer the WHY.
And I think maybe the WHY is answerable only after the cause of WHY (life) is over... maybe that’s why there is a concept of heaven...

Anyway maybe I’m talking a little off course from what you were saying…. all I’m saying is...you cant expect everything around you to be explainable.... and no amount of thinking or pondering is ever going to make these things understandable….like what you were saying - why are some people suffering while others aren’t, why some are beautiful and some aren’t....all these questions are entwined into one vast tapestry ....simply meant to be experienced.. not meant to be understood. Maybe because we're too little within that tapestry to be significant enough to have some answers...
Maybe that’s how he made it. Now its a matter of choice, whether one still want s to delve into all the endless questions…. searching... hoping for a satisfactory answer..
Or, taking life as it comes... questioning…but accepting that some things (a lot) are beyond our comprehension...and will always remain so...
If one is lucky, s/he will find their answers in the smaller things of life - be it a flower, a child, the sea, religion, anything at all...
Others...maybe they prefer to close their eyes to the infinity of questions and open themselves to their finite self....
Maybe the journey of life is at the end, the answer to the question of life...

That’s how I feel...so while u tend to question and ponder, I tend to ignore and accept.... that’s why we're different., but that’s also why we understand each other .

A:
I agree with u partly & disagree on certain other things which you’ve written...
I agree with your points where you say science can max answer how & can never answer why. I agree with you where you say certain things are above & beyond us & are better left untouched, we being weak & small when compared to this amazing creation called the universe...
But I disagree with what you consider above & beyond...when u have answers to certain things present , one should not consider that above & beyond. Questions like why is the sky blue, why couldn’t it have been yellow are above & beyond questions but at the same time questions whose answers will serve no purpose..
So, one should question (this is my opinion), things which serve a purpose in one's life & whose answers help the person to better comprehend the happenings around him - things which give meaning to his life; otherwise, all the events which happen around him are just a series of events...attributed to good luck, bad luck or whatever other superstitious beliefs...

Regarding proof of the existence of an Almighty God, as you’ve said, this universe itself is sufficient proof...according to me, only a fool can consider this universe an accident, an accident of molecules joining together or whatever..
Regarding the outlook to have in life i.e. whether to remain ignorant or ponder, is definitely a matter of choice...no doubt about that...and for either choice made, the person in question is fully responsible... You said, "maybe the journey of life is at the end the answer to the question of life...”, the answer definitely will be got at the end...when we leave this world. The thing is, the answer shouldn’t be something which comes as a surprise...

So, that’s what I feel...


I:
I guess we'll always disagree in such topics…
See, what makes anyone the judge as to whether answers to questions like 'why is the sky blue and not yellow' will serve no purpose?? And what makes one sure that the answers to other questions will help the person better comprehend the happenings around her/him. As for what you said “the thing is, the answer shouldn’t be something which comes as a surprise...' --- that is something which nobody can ever find out before it happens.... no matter how many answers you assume to have got... the end is always going to be a surprise....

All the concepts of death, be it reincarnation, Judgement Day, Moksha, are all ideas, concepts, beliefs that everyone wants to believe. Yet nobody can ever be sure what happens and guess that’s the way it should be. After all, if all one's life one ponders about what will happen Afterwards, s/he's never going to experience the full potential of life because, all the time, the questions will be hovering....
As for thinking that 'only a fool can consider this universe an accident'... well that’s your perception... a person believing the contrary could also say the same about people believing in God....
As in..... a scientist might say that the existence of a single Almighty power which is responsible for all creation is scientifically impossible ....he can break down the entire magic of creation into stages, phases, numbers and equations..
Maybe he's wrong, then again…… maybe he's not..
As I said before….one will never know.
And this dissent of views is a universal debate..
Yes ... the percentage of believers is much, much, much more than that of the disbelievers….--
Doesn’t automatically make them the right ones...

Every concept/belief different from the general belief is usually discarded, and then after getting undeniable proofs, the crowd reluctantly accepts it. Then, slowly it becomes the norm..
I don’t think this is ever going to happen in the case of the Hows and Whys of the universe (but one never knows)....so you can't really discard the idea....
For example...one guy in the US thinks that life on earth was brought on by aliens (Eric Von Daniken - Chariots of the Gods)......and he gives consistent proof. By the end of the book, one wonders why the whole world does not know about these ideas....it’s the same thing.... different concept....reaction of unacceptability....
Anyway that was just an example.

A:
Yes, disagreeing is inevitable in such topics... The debate on this topic will go on & on in the world till the end for sure.. Agreed that being a majority doesn’t make the idea they carry right. Yes, nobody can find the answer before it happens i.e. death, it being a surprise or not, is dependent on what you believed would happen & what actually happens then. Regarding the universe, yes, again, the debate between the atheist & a believer will always be there till the end... Regarding, "every concept/belief different from the general belief is usually discarded ....." , this is very true right from the start of this world, where all prophets sent were despised by their own people...calling them mad, sorcerers etc...


Here ended our debate - a rather abrupt end maybe. As expected, nobody’s opinion was changed, which was but an inevitable and foregone conclusion.

Friday, November 10, 2006

The Mountains of Sohra..


Another beautiful experience...another place… (Maybe I should just call this whole blog my experiences with Nature… as all I seem to write about is its magic.

Anyway, this time it’s a place called Cherrapunjee. Yes, the place which holds the position for having the highest rainfall in the whole world. Actually, the position toggles between Cherrapunjee and a place in its vicinity, Mausynram and I’m not really sure which is currently occupying the top rank. Locally the place is called Sohra, from which the name Cherrapunjee had been derived years ago.

Anyway, since I’ve lived in Shillong which is just about one and a half hrs away from Cherrapunjee, I had been there previously.

People always ask me, ‘Is is always raining there?? Is it all wet and damp there’. And I always tell them that its not like that. I don’t think it has ever been. Until two years, it did rain plenty, but since then, even the rain has decreased. Little known to many people, Cherrapunjee is also known as a Wet Desert. It might be blessed with rain showers, but it is not able to retain the water.

The soil is of a rocky nature because of the presence of lime (I guess), extremely impervious to water. Also due to the heavy rain, the top soil is eroded and with it, so is the capacity to soak the water. You would see hills with no vegetation except a layer of grass and some bushes. No pine trees, or for that matter, trees of any kind. It might rain a lot, but all the water drains away, the soil not being able to soak it. Most of the time, there is an acute water shortage there. Strange isn’t it? But you have to see it to believe it.

Anyway, that day, we left in the morning, hoping to catch a sunny day there, because the last time I’d been there it had been a foggy trip. Because it was a large group we had had fun, but we were not really able to enjoy Mother Nature’s visual extravaganza. Fog had so engulfed the entire area that we had even had to slow down the car as visibility on the roads was extremely low.

Anyway, back to this trip – We were lucky regarding the weather. A clear blue sky with tiny patches of snow white promised a great day of sightseeing. The road to Cherrapunjee is, in itself, a treat for the eyes. For the first half, one comes across almost empty countryside with miles and miles of green interspersed with a few houses here and there. And the road is good (most of the time) - a smooth ride. Halfway through, the countryside is replaced by gorges and cliffs - a single road meandering across kilometers and kilometers of immediate nothingness on the left, and a single wall on the right. The view is breathtaking. On the left, just across the deep gorge is another mountain of almost the same height, which has a road which leads to the border town of Dawki. On the right, it’s not a cliff exactly, more like vertical hills with vegetation.

I usually get a little nauseous on such hilly trips, but this once I decided that I wasn’t going to miss any of the scenery and I’m glad I was able to keep my eyes open without feeling sick.

Our first destination in Cherrapunjee was not, as expected anything natural. It was the Ramakrishna Mission. Established in the earlier part of the century, this institution is a part of much larger organization which has centres all over the country (world even). Apart from the shrine dedicated to Sri Ramakrishna Paramhansa, it has a school complete with boarding facilities, workshops for Weaving, and other handicrafts, the whole atmosphere within the portals of the place is one of discipline and peace.

Next we headed for the Nohkalikai falls. There’s a rather morbid folk tale (which was told by my mother that evening after we’d returned home) associated with this majestic waterfalls. One can’t really judge the credibility or truth of the tale but I’ll share it nevertheless. Why should I be the only one grossed out by the story?

"Once upon a time a widow and her daughter lived in a small hut on the mountain from where the waterfall emerges. The one day, a man came into the life of the widow and she decided to re-marry. As in all such cases, the step-father disliked the daughter intensely and the mother was always worried about the safety of her daughter and so never left her side. One day, due to some urgent reason, the mother had to go to the village nearby. As her husband was not there at home that time, she decided it was safe to leave her daughter there and went away. After some hours, when she came back, she found that her husband had returned and was cooking. He seemed very happy. On looking around, she found her daughter missing and upon enquiring, he told that she had left to roam around in the forest and would return later. Dreading the worst, she decided to go searching for her daughter, when he said that she could search after eating the meal. She reluctantly agreed. He served the meal; rice, meat etc."

Here the story gets a little hazy…I’m not sure how it was that the widow found out…. Maybe
the husband told her, ecstatic in the success of
his gross maneuver, or sh
e deduced it..

What maneuver, you ask? Well, he had obviously killed the daughter, and then….had cooked her up and had served her as lunch to the very person who had borne her.

Yea I know. Sick

The story goes that the mother was so shattered, she could not want her own life to continue…. So, she jumped off the waterfalls - a very watery end to her existence.

I don’t know whether the falls was named after her or her daughter or if the name is at all related to the story. Nevertheless....

[24th July,2007 :
Its been a while since i posted this, but recently a fellow Shillongite commented on the blog and gave a new version to the Nohkalikai folk tale... here goes..

"....and the story is quite similar, except that she found the fingers and toes of the child in the 'kwai' box and I think the falls only formed after she jumped from the cliff - hence the name Noh(dive/jump) ka likai (the dive/jump point of likai). Anyway, such is the case with folktales eh---they're always changing yet nevertheless survive the changing times.."]

Anyway, the Nohkalikai falls emerges from a cliff which is a body of rock connecting 2 parallel mountains; Very much like the road on which we traveled, here also there are 2 mountains separated by a smaller distance, facing each other. So, one can’t actually go to the place where the waterfalls drops, one can only view it from strategically placed viewpoints on one of the mountains. Because of the distance and height, from the viewpoints, the falls looks much smaller than the massive body of water it actually is. However, the intensity of the sound of rushing water, even at such a distance never lets anyone forget the royal splendour of the haunting falls..;

Localites say that the Nohkalikai commands patience from the people who come to see it. The reason being an almost perennial envelop of fog hovering over the valley where the waterfalls is located. That day too, everything was sunny when we reached Cherrapunjee, however as we neared the viewpoints, by some extraordinary coincidence, the weather partially became foggy.

Amazingly, on the road we were on, on one side was bright sunshine, on the other (the side where the waterfalls was), sparse clouds seemed to float around, creating a semi-opaque environment. By the time we reached the viewpoint, the fog had completely enveloped the mountain and the valley
below, which meant that all we got to see when we overlooked the viewpoint, was a white screen - sometimes thinning with the wind...sometimes thickening. As the last time I had been there was a long time ago, I had completely forgotten how the falls was - as in, amongst all the endless white, I couldn’t at all visualize the falls… whether it was near or far, whether the falls was dropping from the mountain where we standing or the next, whether the water flow was high or low… not a clue.... The only feel we could get, that a massive water body was crashing in the vicinity, was the constant sound of gushing water. It’s a powerful sound… haunting and melodious at the same time.

Some people were already waiting at the viewpoints, hoping that the fog would clear soon. To stand there, with nothing but an envelop of white and grey to entertain you, is indeed trying. Especially when you know there are other beautiful falls where you can go...For the first few minutes, the fog showed no sign of thinning; the weather got cloudier. At that point, my father (who is a singularly restless person) thought we should move ahead. I persisted, ‘a few minutes more’, ‘a few minutes more’…; we also joined the crowd. The first 10-15 minutes tried our patience because we could see just about nothing…. After that, if a wind blew in the right direction, the fog cleared for a few minutes,
revealing a little green with even smaller patches of brown, giving some indication of what lay beneath...

And then, again, within seconds, the wind, changing its mood would restore the whiteness of the scene, and we would all be left thirsting for a clearer picture. And then, magically, gradually, as if wanting to keep its spectators in suspense for as long as possible, the fog cleared.

At first, I could just see the lower portion of the
waterfall, i.e. the pool where the water flowed into.
Even in the slight fog, the sea green colour of the
water was magnificent. Amidst all that white, to
see such a brilliant shade of green in a pool of water was unexpected. I couldn’t take my eyes away from the wonderful vision unfolding in front of my eyes. Gradually, we could see the larger picture, the mountain at the other side, the valley below, the point at the cliff from where the water emerges, the green carpet of trees, the water trickling( from that distance it seemed to be trickling) down form the pool farther and farther away…

An amazing collage of white, green, brown and blue colours, all demanding our attention.

After that, actually speaking, we saw nothing as magnificent. The reality of the water problem hit
us when we saw cliffs, which previously had huge waterfalls emerging at regular distances, all dry. At the distance, one could see the different colour of the cliff at the points where waterfalls used to exist.. It was a distinctly lighter shade of brown as compared to the rock surface around it. On one stretch of cliff, where earlier there used to be 4 waterfalls racing to a rocky bottom, all but one had dried up. And the remaining one was of extremely low water volume… It was a saddening sight. My parents, who had been there many times more than me, were very disillusioned. It was like the beauty of Cherrapunjee, as they had known and seen, was vanishing. Decreased rainfall the last two years had seriously reduced the
natural beauty of the place.

Then, we went to the Maushmai caves. Made of
natural stalagmites and stalactites, these caves
have an exactly opposite effect on one; here comes in place the mystery and danger of nature. The last time I was there, there were no lights within the caves, and we’d taken candles and had entered the caves at one side and after getting past nooks and crevices (with the guidance of our tour guide), so small that it was almost unbelievable that we went through them. This time, although there were lights arranged inside, it was nevertheless more eerie.

Inside actually there are supposedly two ways to go.. one way exits about 150 metres, and
another supposedly leads to Bangladesh.. It is
said that previously the second path was used by traffickers to smuggle goods across and so now that path is blocked. Anyway, after walking for some metres and feeling the cold and clammy rocks, I reached a place from where a small opening which was the only way to proceed further. I decided it was time to face the sunshine once again.

The next place was a waterfalls with the same name as the caves.. Maushmai falls.. probably because they’re located pretty near to each other.. As in most of the sights in Cherrapunjee, you can’t actually be at the falls; you can only view it from a distance. There too our disillusionment
was ongoing –the huge water body had dwindled
into a thread of white from the distance. The
viewpoint is spread over a large area on top of a mountain, complete with a restaurant and all. From there, the plains of Bangladesh are visible. They look very near. Its pretty awesome actually; a range of mountains drastically ending, diminishing into total plains - one can even make out the rivers, fields….

I suppose the Bangladesh border area we saw is totally rural. Hence, there was no sign of civilization from that distance. But the total effect of the nature’s contrary creations; plains and heights- side by side looks really unreal.

A better and slightly nearer view of the Bangladesh plains was obtained at the next place we visited; out last stop in Cherrapunjee. It is
actually a man-made park designed on top of yet another mountain. The highlight of the park is its panoramic view of Bangladesh as well as yet another waterfall which falls further down the road we came through -Kynrem Falls. The falls is such that it pours just next to the road (the road leads to Shella - a small town/village situated in the valley among the mountains). Since it’s much farther down the road, people usually don’t go all the way. A photograph of the falls, which my father had taken years ago from the road and which is now enlarged and framed in our drawing room, shows just how beautiful the falls looks from down below.

We too didn’t go. From there, we directly started
the return journey back to Shillong. If while going, I couldn’t take our eyes off the picturesque terrain, while returning I couldn’t stop glancing at the clouds. When we were on the part of the road with the gorges…I could see proper clouds (I say proper because you can’t mistake these clouds for thick fog) rising up from below, to the surface of the mountain tops, to finally merge into the heavenly skies. It was an unearthly sight… cottony masses gradually rising as if they belonged there…on the terra firma.

Further away as the late afternoon transformed into dusk, my fascination with sunsets was rewarded. I couldn’t precisely see the sunset, but the resplendent havoc created by the sunrays and the clouds amongst the greenery was more than enough. Red and gold mixed in different proportions, painting each shade present in the glorious portrait of the sky.

I sighed. The trip had come to an end…
One day….so much of beauty…
Unforgettable.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Deleted Orkut Profile..

A lot of ideas,
Too less of time,
A lot of plans,
Too less of energy,
A lot of hopes,
Too less of effort,
A lot of friends,
Too less true ones,
A lot of practicality,
Too less of emotions,
A lot of opportunities,
Too less courage,
A lot of sarcasm,
Too less of tact,
A lot of loyalty,
Too less of expression,
A lot of caution,
Too less of spontaneity,
A lot of mistakes,
Too less perfections..
That's a lot of what I am,
There's also a lot more to decipher...

Some disappointments,
Some long-lasting friendships,
Some broken relationships,
Some memorable occasions,
Some beautiful places,
Some ground realities,
Some caring people,
Some illogical fears,
Some terrible nighmares,
Some unforgettable journeys,
Some ecstatic moments,
Some difficult times,
That's a lot of how my voyage has been till now,
There's also a lot more to experience..

Changing lifestyles,
Facing realities,
Taking control,
Correcting mistakes,
Expanding horizons,
Shaping the future,
Searching for tranquility,
That's a lot of what I'm trying to do,
There's also a lot more that needs to be done..
And that's all there is to it........

Friday, October 06, 2006

Anonymous Musings...

I generally don't like inspirational stuff.. but this this something I really liked....


Life
~anonymous~

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person
that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will.

You will have your heart broken probably more than once
and it's harder every time.

You'll break hearts too,
so remember how it felt when yours was broken.

You'll fight with your best friend.

You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.

You'll cry because time is passing too fast,
and you'll eventually lose someone you love.

So take too many pictures, laugh too much,
and love like you've never been hurt
because every sixty seconds you spend upset
is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

Don't be afraid that your life will end,
be afraid that it will never begin.



Thursday, September 14, 2006

Remnants of a Red and Gold Sky..

I was about to post a photo blog of some pictures of my home …. Then I got so caught up in nostalgia that I could not resist jotting down some of those wonderful moments…

I have always been amazed by the sky. As a child, when I first learnt about the stars, planets and the Universe, the wonder that hit me then, that the millions of glistening dots were actually huge bodies , more massive than I could imagine, never left my consciousness. Like very other child, I too once had had aspirations to becoming an astronaut or scientist… to learn about those celestial entities, so far yet so awe-inspiring. With time, those aspirations ceased, yet my wonderment regarding the sky never ceased.

I was fortunate enough to have been born and brought up in a place where the sky was not one faded grey blanket of city lights, dust and pollution where the stars were dull spots, and the moon lost in the mass of grey smoke. For the first 18 years of my life, I have lived in a hill-station, on the slope of a hill with nothing immediately in front of our house. Below our house, after some space, on the hill was another house, and further below, another. There ended the hill, and started another, this time upward. So basically, the moment we opened our doors and stepped into the verandah, there were no buildings or obstacles to keep away the fresh breezes.

Like every other hill-station, the houses were not so near, with the spaces in between occupied by pine trees, and other kinds of vegetation. About a kilometer away, right in front, was a house at exactly our level, and further away, of course, there were valleys and other hills. The most tangible physical feature was a range of mountains pretty far away which occupied most of our western sky view. Our house faces the Northern and Western sky, and hence every evening, we could witness the sunset, provided the weather was in a happy mood.

In the evenings, my mother used to love to walk in the verandah (she still does), watching the sky create its magical spectacle of sun rays, clouds and stars. I must have gotten that from her - love of nature, a feeling of being so small in this vast universe, a feeling of contentment and good fortune that I could see such heavenly beauty almost everyday.

When I was small, my mother had once floated in a superstition in my mind – that in the evening, if one sees a single star and enters the house (without seeing a second star), one is bound to be part of a fight. That fear, coupled with not wanting to miss any part of the glorious sunsets, had made me a permanent occupant of the verandah, right until the sky was dark, and all but a few patches of red and orange had disappeared.


When I was a little older, my Mother told me the reason behind the superstition, that perhaps way back, when the superstition was first told, the wise men must have thought that people should stay outside in the evenings, to breathe the fresh air, and had started this illogical rule. Anyway, by that time, I had become an irreversible fan of nature, and didn’t really mind the mild deception. In fact, deep inside, I was glad for it.

Those evenings will remain indelibly in my memory….

Apart from those evenings, my Mother and I shared the beauty of another glittery canvas… which happens so frequently that people forget to notice; The Night sky.

Sometimes, for absolutely no reason, we’d be in the verandah at night….especially if it was a really clear night, or it was slightly warmer than usual. The cool winds would rid us of all discomfort and I’d again start looking skywards. At home, like I said before, the sky was darker, and the stars more defined, as if each trying to show off its jeweled exterior. Besides the sky, all the mountains at the western and northern horizon had buildings, the lights of which shone from the distance. It was like another sky below the horizon; Sometimes, the sky and the land would all seem to merge into one… the tiny lights miles away and the majestic stars millions of light years looked alike.

On some rare nights, when there was a sudden power-cut in the whole area due to some electric fault somewhere, the darkness was enchanting.

If it was a moonless night, there was total darkness in whichever direction one looked, except heavenwards. And what a sight it was up there! Millions of diamonds engraved on one sheet of black…millions of possibilities waiting to be discovered..

If it was a moony night, then it seemed like a mild tube light had been turned on in the sky, bathing very object with its silvery rays. All the distant buildings, trees, lampposts would be coloured in shades of grey, with any surface of metal glimmering without any harsh intensity. It would look unearthly.

I often wished I could capture the vision somewhere, so as to never forget, and to always see…that was never to happen… no camera could capture the awe or the magnificence….that was only to experience..

And then, once power was restored, lights would be blinking in every direction, again creating the alternate sky. As my mother would be calling me inside, I would be torn between wishing power was gone again and being glad that it was back. (Why glad?? Well…there would be some TV serial that I would not have wanted to miss .. )


Even now, when I live in a different place, I often remember those halcyon evenings, those starry nights.

I can still feel the wind chilling my face, while I look westwards.
I can still hear the silence, a pressure cooker going off at a distant kitchen is the only tangible sound, besides the sound of crickets, far away cars,
I can still experience the peace of mind….

Back then, I had often wished I had a camera with me… so that I could store every beautiful sunset, every single ray… But I didn’t. Now when I do have one (a simple one on my cell-phone), I’m not in that place anymore…I go there once in a while, and the last time I went, I clicked to my heart’s content.

For me, the camera is my source of creativity….and I use it at the oddest of times…
----on the way back from office..
------from the terrace at 2 am in the morning…
--------on the road, stuck in traffic….

Any place..

It’s like maybe I’m trying to capture all the beautiful sights I see… to compensate for those lost skyscapes…..

Have a look..

Friday, September 01, 2006

A Reluctant Ode..

Things finally seem to have settled.. One year... its taken me that long to finally understand the dynamics of professional life and the changes in personal life that come along with it..Anyway, apart from a few falls and mishaps, the past one year has been a treasure of experiences, both pleasant and bitter.In retrospect, I really have very few regrets; just one or two stray decisions which I took due to coaxingly coercive misguided do-gooders...but that’s ok... taught me a thing or two about human psychology.

In my 23 years of mellow existence, (out of which I spent the first 5 years enjoying life, the next 10 years enjoying school life with an intensity only slightly lesser than the first 5 years, the next 7 years enjoying +2 college life and graduation, with as much voracity as previously, barely having time to philosophize about the moods and methods of the human mind), after traversing the past year, I have come to an unwelcome conclusion.

I say unwelcome because the conclusion is not conducive to my kind; my kind meaning the female kind.Since the last year, I’ve realized that I get along more with guys than girls. I seem to think more like them than like girls. I've even been euphemized as 'a good looking gal with a guy's brain'..Hmmmmm.. That’s a compliment I really liked :)..

Guys live in a totally alternate universe of mindsets; their thoughts, their methods, their strategies are all clear cut - straight and forward...no curves of artifice or cunning present to mar their direction of thinking. They don't believe in hiding their feelings - be it anger/frustration/annoyance/hurt. In a way its good.

Ever witnessed a fight between to guys who are friends?? Few words, one punch, one look of disbelief, another punch, a feeling of having vented out one's feelings, and voila! They are back to being friends again. Some call this caveman technique and label it as uncivilized. Well, I guess the cavemen must have been really happy if that’s the way they solved quarrels – I agree it could lead to injuries detrimental to the health of the parties involved but isn’t a little physical hurt much better than the endless mental disturbance of continuing a cold war? Having some things to the other person and yet not expressing them for the sake of appearances – that’s what we girls do (mostly).

(In the lines ahead, wherever I’ve said ‘we’ I’ve meant the female species in general)

It’s mostly about the ego…. If we have a problem, we expect that the person, who might in some way be responsible for the problem, should automatically understand and sense it and rectify the issue, or at least apologize. If the other person is a girl, well, then we’re at a universal deadlock…. By some il/logical reasoning she’ll conclude that she has done no wrong and if anything the other girl should say something to the effect of sorry… Herein starts the clash of egos… leading to cold war… and then if neither melt down…..to a final detachment. It might have been some very minor issue, which could have been resolved by a direct conversation bringing out whatever each one has against the other…. But no! That’s not how most of us do it.

Had it been a guy at the other end, well than maximum chances are, the problem would have been solved within the space of a week if not earlier. Why? Because, he’d notice something weird in her behaviour (which she would invariably portray, not trying in the least to hide her obvious displeasure), ask her directly. She’ll scream at him, speak about what wrongs he had (or maybe had not) done; he’ll soothe her with a few choice words of apology, and maybe a few flowers….and there the matter is closed.

I feel that the root of all differences is the fact that most of us are a little too touchy and overly sensitive sometimes. A major part of our miseries are caused by trivialities…
’She didn’t call me’,
‘He didn’t pay his share’,
‘She didn’t wish me on my anniversary of the day I was proposed to’,
‘I’m not going to her party; she called me at the last minute’,
‘I hate her – she always teases me about my clothes/dressing sense/makeup/shoes/etc./etc.’,
‘She’s way too friendly with my guy’,
‘I don’t like the way she acts as if she is the queen’,
……

Unfortunately I could go on…
But I don’t want too…

With guys, I think its more open and maybe a little too direct ….Being a female myself, I say ‘a little too direct’, because we are hardly ever capable of directness and so we count even a little frankness as ‘a little too direct’..
If a guy has a problem with another person (be it a male/female), 95 times out of 100, he’ll go and confront that person –
‘What is the matter’,
‘Why are you behaving differently?’
‘Is everything all right?’
‘Is there a problem?’
….. (These are probably the politest quotes that they use, in all probability, with a person of the female gender…
If it’s a guy, the quotes would have been somewhat different and spiced up with a vast vocabulary of profanities and abuse… and the best part is that the other guy would have answered in the same swearing dialect without the least hesitation – he wouldn’t have become outraged at the usage of such unmentionable words…. Hahaha….not that I advocate such language…)

Hmmmmmm, its not that guys have it good all the way….but right now.. I’ll leave it at this point..
Let the guys feel a little light… a little heady……
Praises showering for them…
Eventually, they will come back to earth , maybe after reading a subsequent post I’ll write….
Let that remain in the shadows for now.. because I, myself don’t know when I’ll write about the intricacies of the female kind…their thought process, their compassion, their essence which sets them a gender apart..
After all there’s so much to say about us….

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Disturbing Thoughts.

Some things that really disturb me or leave me pondering:

People eating their meals alone,

People doing tedious jobs which are thankless and low-paying (the liftman, for example),

Small-time roadside vendors trying to sell their wares but hardly succeeding, (it’s actually the sight of seeing their forlorn and expectant faces while you cross their stalls/carts),

People walking barefoot on the roads,(they act as a reminder that while some of us don't think twice before buying shoes worth 2000 bucks, some consider shoes a luxury, not being able to spend their meagre funds on even a pair of chappals)

When someone’s persona is so defined by his uniform that when you see them out of uniform, you feel a sense of familiarity but cannot really place them. (Have you ever noticed the security guard at office when he’s not in uniform?? He might recognize you and smile or whatever, while you’re left trying to figure out where you’ve seen the guy before..)

There might be some more stuff too..but that’s all I could remember right now….

Thursday, August 03, 2006

...Straight From the Heart..


Here’s a list of people who have influenced/ have been influencing my humdrum life in more ways than they know…

With the test of time and/or distance, some have faded into oblivion while some are as bright as before…It’s an assorted list so there’s no method or relevance attached to the order…

‘Mickey Mouse’:- My first crush….Hahaha…Now when I look back at those days, I wonder at my silliness. This guy used to live in the same colony as me and his house was on the way to the bus stand. I knew him long before I knew that I had a crush on him..
He was a few years my senior and his school bus would leave the stand about 5 minutes before I reached the stand. Sometimes, if I reached the stand a little earlier than usual, I would strain my eyes to find him among the array of students in a sea of Navy Blue and White.. And the day he stopped to smile at me or spoke a word or two of commonplace stuff, I’d be in the seventh heaven of delight – I’d rush home, wait for my brother to go for his daily dose of friends and Cricket, and then start scribbling all details in my diary. (I never dared to bring my diary within visual range of my (at that time) terrifying elder brother, who always threatened me about reading my diary – Hope he never did..) Anyway, this infatuation of mine persisted for quite some time and at that time I used to think that I’d never get over him. I guess all of us feel that way about our first crush.
And then one fine morning, while going to some relative’s house, I see that that house and its contents, people and furniture both, were moving out of our colony. On making some nonchalant enquiry, I found out that they were shifting to another colony in another locality. And so he shifted. After a few days, another family moved into that same house. Supposedly there was a girl of my age in that family. Unreasonably, without knowing her, I disliked her immensely. (Poor girl…it wasn’t her fault after all..)

'Tuki’:- Hmmm if you’re still feeling sorry for the girl I mentioned above, well she basically survived my initial prejudice, and now is a close friend of mine. How? That’s a mystery. We used to go the same tuition classes, and we clicked from the first day. I told her why I disliked her for no reason… she and I had a good laugh over it. The best part was, our tutor used to leave us free a lot of times, so we used to get a lot of time for idle chatter. It’s very easy talking to her; we come from very similar backgrounds. When it came to doing graduation after 12th, we tried to somehow get through the same institute, but this girl from my college took the seat ‘Tuki’ was supposed to take.(Darn her!) However, time and distance never created a rift between the two of us – she even came down to my college for a short trip…The same thing happened when it came to jobs; The company she got selected in chose not to select me, while the company that selected me didn’t opt for her. It’s fortunate that we’re from the same region, state, city and colony even and eventually do meet up.

‘Anin’ :- This girl! She had taken my friend’s place while selecting Institutes for graduation. So, I obviously was not too happy with her. (Later, she told me once that she disliked me from college times itself – something to do with the attitudes of our entire gang of college friends).Nevertheless, since we were from the same college and going to the same institute, our parents decided to become friendly.
Coincidentally, when we were going for admission to the institute, we were in adjoining compartments in the train. While our parents talked and all, we mutually didn’t approach each other. However, when we reached the new city, the unfamiliar surroundings sort of made us talk to each other. We kept on cribbing about the place and felt homesick. This was the initial bond that joined us. With the start of classes, and the initial depression after the respective parents left, the bond strengthened what with the seniors commencing their ‘Fresher Initiation Program’ commonly known as ragging. She’s one of a kind, in her own world, not bothering about things like idle gossip. Boy! She loved to sleep, way back in 1st year… she was (and still is) this treasure of reassurance and common sense. Although we’re in different places now, haven’t met in a year now, hardly ever keep contact through mail/phone, she remains special to me.

‘Ng’ :- This guy used to endlessly tease Anin in Group Get-togethers by saying he had a crush on her. Hahaha! All of us used to have a good laugh seeing her annoyed face when he unabashedly emoted about his feelings. I’ve known him properly for about 3 years now and well….he’s the one guy I can rely on to give an honest and frank opinion about anything I ask. Luckily he’s also working in the same city as I am and he’s helped me over the student to professional transition period. I blurt out all my endless complaints and problems in front of him, and sometimes even I don’t tell him if something is troubling me, he knows it and somehow manages to cheer me up. Basically he always puts a smile on my face..:)

‘Debo’ :- One of Ng’s closest friends, I got to know him somewhere during the beginning of the final year of Graduation. Now, we often look back and wonder wistfully as to why we never managed to come to anything close to acquaintance in the first 3 years of graduation. As he also comes from the same region as I, I met him on the train too, but neither of us found anything out of the ordinary in each other I guess. Different branches in colleges further allowed no contact. It is a fellow hostel mate that I need to thank for renewing my acquaintance with him which grew into the easy friendship that we have today. That hostel mate of mine used to chat with him frequently from my PC as hers had some problem. One day, he sent a message or something (… I don’t remember the exact circumstance), and she wasn’t in the hostel (or had gone home)..so I replied… we got to talking - from homesickness to movies to books to favourites to college to friends… - That’s how it started….

‘Poo’ :- She was also a fellow hostel mate. I talked to her on the 1st day of class (during graduation) and that first chat brought on so many similarities….it was simply meant to be. She’s the same Sun sign as me, her hobbies are similar to mine, our attitudes were same, we just hit it off. Maybe I was so scared of losing the one person who seemed to understand me, that I never left her side. Or maybe it was the other way round, or maybe we just liked hanging out together. Five years of terrible fights, major misunderstandings, temper outbursts and although we’re not the same as we were five years ago, we still respect each other and try to stay in touch. Some past history might have changed how we are today, sometimes I wish that the ease of the early days come back, but then some changes are irreversible; and one needs to live with that.

‘Apra’:- Another girl who shares the same sun sign as me but we two are as different in some aspects as we are similar in some. Classmates since the 3rd standard, we’ve shared a lot, experienced a lot, misunderstood a little, but at the end of it we share a common sense of belonging and understanding. Even now when we meet, maybe after a gap of a year, its like nothing has changed - there is no discomfort at all. We keep talking nineteen to the dozen, cribbing, complaining, laughing, consoling….assured that things are going to remain just the same if we meet up again after a day or after a year. Its amazing really, we hardly ever keep in touch; maybe only if we have some important work or one of us is traveling to the other’s city; and yet we feel so much at ease in each other’s company…

‘Ghoda’:- another guy who shares the same sun sign as Apra (and hence as me..:) . He’s the cutest….Tall, Dark, Handsome….always smiling.. playing his favourite upbeat tune on his mobile phone each time he felt a little down. Tirelessly hardworking, he and a couple of others shaped the look of our institute during cultural festivals. Like most of the others, we became friendly at the end of 3rd year, but really got close in the final year. This guy, who got the title of Mr.Senti(mental), kept his emotions all closed up inside him, the day we were departing. While I was pouring out tears like an overflowing tap, he was the one who made me laugh …He never lost his cool and still doesn’t.. When it comes to keeping in touch , well he sometimes even calls from London..:) …Someday in the near future hopefully.. we’ll meet up..:)

Vikx:- He’s one of the other guys, who along with Ghoda beautified the auditorium, etc. during ‘Culrav’ our annual festival. Brilliant in sketching, his art was(is) eye-catching and had(has) very much his singly unique style of grinning faces. He hated me in the 1st year of graduation for some misguided reason which took another 2-3 years to finally become trifling enough to ignore. Moody in his typical Cancerian way, it was always a little dicey talking to him back then – you never knew how he’d react. Now, when he’s in a different city (Pune), learning a foreign language, his mood swings seem to have vanished, or maybe they aren’t so apparent from a distance. Anyway, I’m sure glad he got over whatever negative he felt about me and that has made all the difference..

‘Konka’:- She’s also currently in Pune, doing her MBA there. It’s been a friendship of about six years now, out of which we were in the same place for about two years, and the rest has been long distance. Erratically in touch, we’ve hardly met up in the last few years (when we were doing our graduation from separate institutes), and yet the initial years of feeling the same terror while going for tuition to the same brilliant (but a little strict) professor, have always bridged the rift created by distance. Occasional messages or mails keep reminding the both of us that the other still exists..:)J

‘Mandy’:- He’s from a place called Akola which is close to Pune (I guess), and he’s the sweetest, yet the most impish guy I know..! He’s a colleague in office, and we joined in the same batch. I don’t precisely remember how we got to become so friendly; maybe there wasn’t any specific incident that brought us closer, but now, I’m happy to call him a very dear friend of mine. Sometimes he’s kiddish, sometimes he’s mature way beyond his 22 years of existence. He might always be teasing me, but when needed, he’s always there to help. No matter how hard he tries, he can never ACT serious (when he’s finding some situation exquisitely funny). A tiny movement lurks at the corners of his mouth; a half-smile just waiting to become a full fledged grin always gives him away.

‘Siddy’:- Unlike Mandy, he can always manage to act serious even if he’s brimming with laughter. In the process, he can discompose you, like when you start laughing at something which might be funny from one angle, he’ll start lecturing you on the lines,’ you’re laughing. This is not funny..’ even though he knows it is funny. Now that I know him better, I know when to take him seriously and when not to. Invariably frank, he can say almost anything at your face. He’s one person with whom I never need to make an effort to keep in touch coz he always make sure that he remains in contact with his friends. Despite his busy social schedule, he manages to make time for everybody. And, he’s a hardened flirt who starts up conversations with girls with the sympathetic line ‘had a hard day?’. Also, he’s merciless when it comes to teasing… but he’ll always make sure that the victim of his endless teasing isn’t feeling bad…

Pinky’:- Another guy who just couldn’t stay without teasing me (and a couple of other helpless people) was(is) ‘Pinky’. He got this feminine nickname due to some of the Pink shirts that occupied his wardrobe sometime in the 3rd year. As usual, even though he’s from the same region as me, I got to know him much after we joined. It was due to some common friends that we started hanging out in the same group. And then, our friends’ circle participated in a Fashion show competition, and it was during the practice sessions of this show that we got chummier. He was paired with a classmate with whom he had hardly ever talked before, and I (and a few others) would keep on teasing him endlessly regarding her. (Maybe that’s why afterwards he took revenge for that .. ). Anyway now, I get news of him from the classmate with whom he was paired…(Hahaha! Guess we weren’t teasing him in vain, after all). Oh btw! Did I mention that once upon a time I had a crush on him, and even though he knew all about it, he forbore to tease me about it until the day we left college and that too in the most un-embarrassing manner possible.

‘Jhandu’:- This girl who was paired with Pinky – That’s her. Well, by a stroke of luck (bad luck for her), she got posted to the same place as me, and now we are room-mates. She’s one a kind – very clear about what she wants with her life and how she’s going to go about it. I know her and yet don’t know her. She’s very open and yet very reserved. Normal everyday things, movies, songs, places, books etc.- and she’s overflowing with thoughts. However, when it comes to her emotions (besides anger), feelings - you’ll never know when she’s hurting or depressed. That’s a part of her that she does not share…Hmmm…maybe time will change that….who knows?

‘Remo’:- She was my virtual roomie for quite some time in the last few months..:) A colleague in office, from the very first day, I felt a connection with her. Anyway that soon developed into a close friendship.. her confiding nature complimented my listening and sympathetic attitude. She always told me about her problems, and I would try helping her in some or the other. Likewise, when I suffered from my intermittent bouts of depression, she’d try her level best to bring me out of my blues. Since she stayed at a Paying Guest accommodation which she didn’t like, I used to invite her over to my place over the weekend, and that’s how she became my virtual roomie. Now, though we we’re in different offices, we still manage to meet up occasionally. Even when we don’t, we’re secure in the knowledge that the other is just a phone call away.

‘Annu’:- Another close friend from office, she was the first person I was acquainted with from our batch. We’d met via Orkut and she’d been the person I’d been in touch with before joining the company. Very practical in approach, she has a different life outside of office, with her friends from college. She’s mastered the art of balancing the two friends’ circles. She’ll not say much, but when she does say something, it will be something very witty..:). Like Remo, we hardly ever meet but still manage to keep in touch via e-mail forwards, phone calls or occasional meet-ups. She’s always ready to help, and on one instance when I was having trouble adjusting in Bangalore, she had un-hesitantly offered me her place to stay in. Always smiling, you’ll never see her get flustered or angry.:)

Rats:- She’s the Crazy + Unique + so much more individual I mentioned in the post ‘A Taste of Belgium’. Now that she’s moved to Delhi, sometimes I feel like emotionally blackmailing her as to why she left us all and got a transfer to Delhi (not that it would help matters). She’s got a fabulous way with words, and now I finally managed to convince her to get out of her inertness and author a blog. She calls up regularly, especially when she misses Bangalore and us. Despite being in a different city, she still manages to find time to try to sort out problems of people here, me included..:) She plans to come to Bangalore once in the near future, lets hope that happens soon..:)

Daffy: This very different and affable guy is a very special friend of mine. Never had I expected to become so close to him. You know why, because I never really believed in the mode of acquaintance through which we met – Internet. It’s pretty ironic that I’ve lost touch with the common friend due to whom I met Daffy. Initially, whenever we met online, we talk about the same inane stuff, ‘how are you’, ‘so what do u do’, ‘ok’, ‘what else’, and we’d forget about the conversations. Somehow, on one fine day, due one of my previously frequent bouts of depression (one and only time when it resulted in something good), we came to talking on the phone. He called up, and somehow we connected. Since then, we’ve never looked back. Shifting to cities, switching jobs never interfered with the warm relationship we shared and still do. We’ve met up, and it wasn’t half as weird as one would have expected. He was the same as he had seemed online and I was glad.. Am still glad to have him as such a good friend..

Janvi’:- Another girl who’s unique in her very own way. From the first day in college, we’ve been friends. With time, the friendship grew. Even now, in the midst of busy office schedules, late hours, she always manages to make that quick call, ‘how are you? How’ve you been?’. She’s my agony aunt – for all the past years I’ve known her, she’s been the one person I’ve been telling all my problems with all other people. Non-judgmental by nature, she believes in ‘Live and Let Live’. You’ll never catch her saying un-complimentary stuff about others; as in she always gives people the benefit of doubt. An absolute sweetheart, I’m sure glad that she got transferred to the same place as me.:)

Hmmmmm, at the end, here are some lines I've borrowed...

"See you and me have a better time than most can dream of, better than the best, so we can pull on through, whatever tears at us, whatever holds us down, and if nothing can be done, we'll make the best of what's around."

"I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay."

- Dave Matthews Band


Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Speechless Eloquence...


There is something haunting about the eyes – it’s always the eyes. It’s said that ‘Eyes are the Mirror to the Soul’ and on reflecting upon the statement, I cannot agree more.

See the eyes of small children, lost in their fantasy world of dolls, toys and imaginary friends – the shine is almost unbelievable. The feeling that one experiences, when seeing such illuminant eyes, can easily be killed by glancing at the eyes of, say, a construction worker, returning home after a tiring day of thankless and low-paying work, in the later part of an otherwise beautiful evening. The exhaustion and disillusionment is almost contagious. You might have had a relatively easy time at work, but one look at those tired eyes – and you’re almost as tired as that person. And this, I say from experience.

I’ve often wondered about the relation between an individual and his work. What is work to a person generally?

Is it just a means to a living?

Or is it a way of giving meaning to one’s life?

Many people spend their whole lives doing something they do not like because they never tried doing anything else. Maybe they took a job (which they did not like) as a temporary relief from economic problem, but later they didn’t make the effort to try to do something they actually like doing.

Many people spend their whole lives looking for the perfect job – they switch from one field to another, trying to become a success but never having the perseverance to confidence to last somewhere.

Some are fortunate enough to find their destination pretty early in their life and they strive and struggle until they achieve their goal. After they do that, they set new goals.

Some know what they want to do, but do not find the courage or strength to follow their dreams; they live their entire lives thinking ‘what if?’.

Its sad that ‘work’ – the thing we do for the major part of our life, we don’t put much thought into the substance of it ; whether we enjoy what we are doing, whether it is path towards fulfilling our dreams… we just go on doing it.. every day; until we get used to it.

Anyway returning back to what I was saying - about the eyes;

How is it that eyes can be so expressive? Leave out tears, or the blinking, or winking or the furrowing of eyebrows; just an eyeball (usually Black), moving in a fluid-like mass of white – that’s enough to exhibit your present mood, and sometimes even the past.

Why is it that besides the eyes, none of the other facial features are endowed with such expressive capacity? Although maybe the eyes are sufficient to do that job. Any other facial feature also expressing your emotions - and your soul will be shown on your face.

It’s pretty easy to mask one’s facial expressions – smile when you are unhappy, be straight-faced when you’re furious, but if the other person looks closely, the eyes always give you away – the eyes are one’s conscience.

Perhaps it’s a blessing in disguise that, not everyone can glance at another’s eyes and gauge the true sentiments; otherwise, all our emotions would be public property with nothing personal or private to call your own. And it’s not that those who can glimpse into the souls of others are very fortunately privileged – they experience the hurt, torment and sadness within each one of us, which we are permanently trying to hide. They are a burdened lot, for they always know the harsh reality.

The most precious gift we have, in the context of experiencing the world, is our eyes. The power of vision is indeed amazing. To feel the cool breeze on your face, while you are seeing the most heavenly beautiful sunset you have ever seen; red and golden rays turning the sky into a glorious spectacle of colours – that is the magic of vision. However, those who have it do not appreciate it, neither do they utilize it. Sometimes we look but never actually see. It is only the fortunate few who have regained vision after blindness who fully appreciate this precious gift.

Maybe it is time we started looking at the beauty around us, be it just a tiny flower, a puddle of water, a lone palm tree swaying with the breeze, or even the eyes of another—one can find beauty in almost everything around us. All we have to do is try and see…